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Five Questions That Lead to Interesting Conversations (and good thank you notes)

Conversation by Valery Kenski found on Flickr CC BY 

When meeting someone for the first time, it's easy to fall back on the standard small talk questions: What do you do? Where are you from? What are your hobbies? While that is good information to know, when you ask more interesting questions, the conversation becomes more authentic.

When you ask interesting questions, you typically get interesting answers. When you get interesting answers, you don't have to force the small talk. The conversation flows more easily and is more memorable for both of you, making your follow-up notes easier to write.

Here are a few of my favorite questions when I'm meeting someone for the first time.

What excites you? It doesn't matter what they say. Self-driving cars. Sustainable living. Balloon animals. Whatever it is, it shows me that there is something out there that lights them up. Something that sparks curiosity. When you find their spark, you have a conversation topic that could last for hours. And any time you find an article or new information around that topic, you now have a reason to re-connect with this person.

What is something you learned recently that interested/inspired you? I'm always looking for new outlets to add to my RSS feed. This is a great question to not only hear about a new project/development, but it could also introduce me to a new resource.

Where do you get new ideas? I used to scroll through pages and pages of stock photography when I was in a design rut on my first job. Other people find a walk through nature provides the clarity they need for ideas to form. I've also heard good conversations with mentors and co-workers surface the best ideas. I like this question because it gives me suggestions on new ways to brainstorm.

When you were young, what did you want to be when you grew up? People who know me aren't surprised to learn that I wanted to be a librarian when I was younger. I thought I would be able to read and organize shelves all day, which sounded like the perfect job. Asking people to think about their passions when they were young gives you a glimpse into what they enjoyed before the reality of paycheck and bills and adulting set in.

What is the most interesting thing happening in your industry right now? A much broader question than, "What do you do for a living?", asking about current trends in their industry opens the conversation to hypotheticals. The what-ifs and maybes. In the education industry, it's fascinating to watch faculty and students claim ownership over the learning in their classroom through authentic projects designed with real-world applications. How will this affect the way students view problems in the world, in school, and in their career? Are we ready for a generation of entrepreneurs? That is a conversation I would love to have.

Quality conversations provide a great opportunity to follow up with a LinkedIn message, an email or a hand-written note a few days later. Highlight one or two topics you covered, such as a new tool they introduced you to or an author they recommended. More than likely, the conversation will be memorable as is, but when you include a hand-written note, you will be difficult to forget.

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